Monday, July 30, 2007

We're Home!

Hi Sweeties,

We finally made it home last night! I see they cut down some trees near the farmhouse and I can see your house as I went to mine! (It only made me cry).

We enjoyed our time at Tia's house. I finished painting Luna's room, and Pop Pop put up shelves and shaded! It looks great! Did I tell you it is an Under the Sea theme? We also traveled while in Colorado. We went to Colorado Springs and visited the Garden of the Gods. We also went up Pike's Peak where they have Santa's Workshop! Before the Colorado Springs trip, we also went to Santa Fe for a weekend!

I'll be working on the soon. My hope is one day you will find this blog or the site. That way you can always find me! Give me a week or two to get it up!

Here are some pictures of Luna!

Can you believe she markered herself? She drew "tatoos" on Tia's arms and Tia even went to work with them on her arms!

Do you remember when we all went to the sand dunes? Well, we went again... Luna, me and Pop Pop. There was quite a bit of water in Medano Creek, and Luna had so much fun. We stayed the night and Luna wore her bathing suit the next day! It began to rain in the afternoon, and we went walking around the nature trail. We were almost alone and got close to a deer that was licking the grills! I guess she liked the taste of barbeque sauce!

Luna called us tonight to see if we got home safely. She asked right away if I had seen you two girls! She wanted to know why I could not see you. So, I finally said that your mom is mad at me and won't let me see you.

But really, it's going on 3 years now! I'd really like to know if your mom is going to EVER forgive me for whatever it was that she thinks I did! I can't think of ANYTHING that warrants three years of anger! Wow. I would like to make up and try to get past this. How can she stay mad for SO long? If you ever get to read this, please tell her her it is just not worth this silence, and in the end, she is only hurting herself. I pray every day that this will be over. I want to see you and hug you SO badly. This hole in my heart still hurts.

OK, sweeties. I miss you oodles and oodles! I love you more than chicken, forever!
Love, Mom Mom

Friday, July 20, 2007


Hello Sweeties,

I found this poem online tonight, and it sums up how I've been feeling. It's been 7 months and I miss you not one drop less. The entire mess has lasted almost 3 years! I think of you all the time, and the pain has not eased.

Missing You

No words I write can ever say,
How much I miss you everyday.
As time goes by the loneliness grows,
How I miss you... nobody knows.

I think of you in silence,
I often speak your name.
But all I have are memories,
And a photo in a frame.

No one knows my sorrow,
No one sees me weep.
But the love I have for you,
Is in my heart and mine to keep.

I never stopped loving you,
I don't think I ever will.
Deep inside my heart,
You are with me still.

Heartaches in this world are many,
But mine is worse than any.
My heart still aches as I whisper low,
"I need you... and miss you so."

The things we feel so deeply,
Are often the hardest things to say.
But I just can't keep quite anymore,
So I'll tell you anyway.

There is a place in my heart,
That no one can fill.
I love you... and I always will.

Last night I dreamed about you girls and Micah, again. I dreamed I got to see you and hug you. I kept squeezing and kissing you! It was painful to wake up and find it was not true. I'm keeping this short, as I don't like to write when I am this sad. I miss you terribly and love you so much. I can't wait for the day when we can see each other. I thank God for Luna, as I am enjoying her so much. I remember how you all played together. I'm keeping my grandmother skills fresh with Luna. She is SO smart and getting SO big! She is taking gymnastics now and while we are here, I get to watch her. Then we do laps together!

Tomorrow we are going to Colorado Springs! I will write more when we get home, and post some pictures!

I love you more than chicken, and always will!
Hugs and Kisses, Mom Mom