Dec6: Long time

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Hello sweeties,

I have not been able to post in almost two months- posting here is like rubbing salt in the wound. I miss you SO much. I think of you allt he time, and wonder how you're doing in school, if you had a good Christmas, and that Savannah's birthday is coming up. This will be yet another birthday I will miss, not to mention Christmas.

I wonder every day how long this will go on. It's been one year and two months without seeing or talking to you. It's been three years and 3 months since your mom has spoken to me. It's storming right now... a huge thunderclap just occurred... I wonder if Mari or your little brothers were scared! Our new puppy sure was! She jumped right up and looked out the window! Your mom used to be SO scared of thunderstorms when she was small, and would go to sleep on my lap every time we had an electrical storm; back East, this was common in the spring!

Santa Claus brought Luna a doll house, very much like the one I had gotten years ago for you girls- the one you loved to play with in the sunroom. She asked me if I would bring it with me next time I go visit, so she can play with both, because she misses you girls SO much too. I think I will take it, and then bring it back to the sunroom.

Someone broke out a window in the sunroom while we were in Colorado, and the sunroom got FILTHY! I need to spend about two days cleaning it out. But your toys, toy box and Winnie the Pooh furniture is still there!

My honeys, I miss you so much, I can hardly stand it I keep thinking that one day you will knock on my door, or call me! I think it may happen! I LOVE you to pieces!

ONE day I will see you again, I am sure of it. I SO hate missing these years of your childhhood. We can never recover that time. But when you are bigger and seek me out, we will make up for lost time. I promise!

Here is Luna, at the Mexican restaurant, on her birthday!